Shared Living Profile: Julie M. (ARC Exclusive)

Before Julie M. moved into her current Shared Living home, her family was facing a crisis.

Julie, 60, had experienced several Group Home and Shared Living arrangements that hadn’t worked out. She was self-harming, had lost a dangerous amount of weight, and was regressing in skills she had long since mastered. Her primary care physician and family believed she was failing to thrive. Palliative care—and even hospice—had become considerations.

Julie’s sister and guardian, Cheri, began searching for another option. After being referred to Nonotuck by disability rights advocate Cheryl Ryan Chan, Cheri connected with the Auburn team.

Within a month, Julie was matched with Shared Living Provider Prudence and housemate Terri in Worcester.

“When I tell you things moved fast, I was in a state of shock,” Cheri says. “Within those 30 days, Julie not only moved—she moved to the very best residential setting of her life, beyond what even I provided as family.”

The change in Julie was quickly apparent.

Within two weeks of moving in, she began gaining weight, eventually surpassing 100 pounds. She rediscovered her enthusiasm for food, enjoying the fresh meals Prudence and Terri prepare and watching them cook.

She also began getting out into the community again.

“She loves shopping, going out to eat, adventures, day trips—she’s a high-stimulation person,” Cheri says.

At home, Julie, Prudence, and Terri listen to music and dance together. Julie especially loves the Beatles and Elton John. They take walks, go out to dinner and embark on day trips throughout New England. Prudence keeps Cheri connected along the way through regular photos and text messages.

“They send me pictures that move me to tears,” Cheri says. “I haven’t seen Julie that happy in more than ten years.”

Just as important has been Julie’s ability to make choices about her own life.

Julie is nonverbal, but she communicates her preferences in other ways. Prudence and Terri pay attention to those expressions and give her opportunities to make decisions for herself.

When Prudence wanted Julie to have a chair in her bedroom where she could sit while getting dressed, for example, she didn’t simply choose one for her. She brought Julie to a furniture store and let her try different chairs.

Cheri received photos as Julie tested them. Some she clearly didn’t like. Others received little reaction. Then Julie tried one that made her smile.

That was the chair they brought home.

“They are enormously respectful of her dignity and her choices,” Cheri says.

For Cheri, moments like that illustrate just how much has changed. Julie is rebuilding skills, spending time in her community, making choices and enjoying the everyday experiences that make her happy.

And after years of uncertainty, her sister is seeing something she had deeply missed.

Julie is happy.